Understanding Self-Harm:

Self-harm, also known as self-injury or self-mutilation, refers to the deliberate act of inflicting pain or injury to oneself without suicidal intent. It often serves as a way to cope with overwhelming emotions, numbness, or distressing thoughts. Cutting, burning, scratching, biting, hair pulling, head bashing, or pinching oneself are all examples of self-harming behaviors. It can also involve acts that are not included here. The motives for self-harm are frequently fairly complicated. Even so, self-harm is frequently referred to as an outward expression of interior emotions. There are numerous complex reasons why people engage in self-harm, and discussing it can be difficult and sensitive.It is important to understand the various reasons why people self-harm and what you can do to assist someone who is hurting themselves.

Reasons why someone may harm themself.

While there are numerous complex reasons why someone participates in self-harming behavior, it is frequently a means of coping with acute emotional discomfort. People who self-harm may have felt (or are presently experiencing) despair, guilt, depression, anxiety, trauma, loss, numbness, loneliness, fear, or wrath.

Inflicting pain on oneself may feel like a release, and they may believe they can deal with emotional distress more effectively. Some self-harmers believe that it allows them to express powerful negative emotions that they are unable to articulate. Others say it offers them a sense of power and control. Some people believe it is a type of self-punishment for their perceived flaws.

Common reasons  for self-harm may include:

• Experiencing intense sadness, pain, or rage.
• Wanting to feel something when they are numb or disconnected.
• exposure to a terrible experience.
• Being bullied or abused.
• Worrying about life’s stresses at school, home, and work
• Suffering from grief after losing someone near.
• It is socially desirable, and their classmates are doing it.

The self-harming cycle

Self-harm often begins as an attempt to release the pressure caused by distressing thoughts and sensations. This may provide brief reprieve from the emotional agony the individual is experiencing. It’s vital to understand that this reslief is only temporary because the fundamental causes still exist. Soon after, feelings of guilt and humiliation may arise, which can perpetuate the cycle.

Because there may be some brief relief at first, self-harm might become a typical way of dealing with life’s challenges. It is important to note that self-harm does not always imply a suicide attempt. Self-harming behavior may not always indicate suicide ideation. They may use self-harm to cope with and relieve intense unpleasant emotions. However, self-harm increases the risk of suicide, thus it is critical to get help. This means that you should talk to someone as soon as possible to get the necessary support and assistance. Learning new coping techniques to deal with these issues can help interrupt the cycle of self-harm in

Indicators of self-harm

• Cutting behaviours;
• Other forms of self-harm, such as burning, scalding, banging, hair pulling, placing ligatures around neck;
• Self-poisoning;
• Not looking after their needs properly emotionally or physically;
• Direct injury such as scratching, cutting, burning, hitting yourself, swallowing or putting things inside;
• Staying in an abusive relationship;
• Taking risks too easily;
• Eating distress (anorexia and bulimia);
• Addiction for example, to alcohol or drugs;
• Low self-esteem and expressions of hopelessness.

Signs to look out for when concerned someone is self-harming

It can be difficult to tell whether someone is self-harming. Here are some signs that might suggest someone could be self-harming:

• Withdrawal or isolation from everyday life
• Signs of depression include low mood, tearfulness, lack of motivation, or interest in anything
• Mood changes
• Changes in eating/sleeping habits
• Changes in activity and mood, e.g. more aggressive than usual
• Talking about self-harming or suicide
• Abusing drugs or alcohol
• Expressing feelings of failure, uselessness or loss of hope
• Risk-taking behaviour (substance misuse, unprotected sex)
• Signs of low self-esteem such as blaming themselves for any problems or saying they are not good enough
• Unexplained cuts, bruises or marks
• Covering up all the time, when in hot weather
• Being quieter than usual
• Lacking energy

It is important to know that these may be signs of other things and don’t always mean someone is self-harming. Also, there may be no warning signs at all. It is therefore important that if you suspect someone you know is self-harming, you ask them openly and honestly.

What to say to someone who self-harms?

Discovering that a friend or family member is self-harming can be a difficult experience as self-harm is a challenging and sensitive topic that some people may struggle to understand or discuss. You may have discovered it accidently (for example, by noticing scarring on their body), through someone close to them, or because the person told it to you explicitly.

When discussing self-harming behaviour with someone, it is critical to stay calm and nonjudgmental. Here are some suggestions for having the conversation:

• Find a neutral, private area to discuss it.
• Tell the person that you are sincerely concerned, that you care about them, and that you are scared.
• Do your best to be a good listener. Do more than just listen; use body language and open-ended inquiries to encourage the other person to speak.
• Do not become angry with the person or disregard their self-harming behavior as an attempt to gain attention.
• Keep reminding yourself that you are there for this person.
• Be patient, as the person may need some time to convey their emotions.
• Ask them why they are self-harming.
• Investigate whether self-harm gives a release for the emotions they are experiencing.
• Inform them that support is accessible. Emphasize that help is effective not only for self-harming behavior, but also for underlying mental distress.
• Always have a nonjudgmental attitude. This does not imply that you should support self-harming behavior. Instead, make it evident that you are concerned about the individual’s well-being.
• Brainstorm some diversion strategies so that when they feel the need to self-harm, they can prevent it by engaging in less hazardous activities. Examples include keeping and flicking a rubber band around the inside of their wrist, holding ice in their hands, exercising, or writing down their emotions.